Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Pretty Fly for a White Guy - A Psycoanalysis


Pretty Fly For a White Guy – A Psychoanalysis
By: David McGhee

First off I would like to set the tone of character for our subject, Bryan “Dexter” Holland, of the acclaimed punk rock combo “The Offspring.” The name itself rife with meaning and does suggest a sense of superiority towards his elders. But we are here today to discuss the band's most popular song. Which if you take a closer look, you see a cascade of racism and pity for the lesser endowed man.
Dexter grew up in Garden Grove, Orange County, California, which was at the time and still is, a high rent area. So we know that Dexter had means during his young and adolescent years. During puberty he attained what only 3.9 percent of American men will be at full height. Standing at 6'2” he automatically exudes authority and could have possibly been self entitled. Though it is rare to have a tall person without an equally endowed temperment


it can probably be said that all in all, he is probably a nice guy. We have witnesses Seth Green, who worked with the band in the movie “Idle Hands.” He said that they were really cool guys. Guys as in two or more or as in all? The world may never know. But for the sake of this argument say he is of the average male variety with an average height / temper ratio.
He has admitted in the press that not attaining success until he was nearly thirty has made him appreciate his wealth and social standing. But as said, he grew up with means and was in a family that actively encouraged academia and he has a degree in molecular biology. So he's an intelligent man. Which, you guessed it. Is common in men of higher altitude


And before you start judging this man, remember that taller men also get more poon tang.

*Look up citation for taller men more sex*

“Gunter glieben glauchen globan”

This sample (from Def Leppard's “Rock of Ages,” a song presumably about the history of rock and roll, from it's blues inspired roots up to the eighties “cock rock,” or “Hair Metal”) has no actual meaning in the words themselves. But the vein in which it proceeds is very German in sound. More Austrian maybe? Perhaps this is a shout out to the great Austrian physician, a one “Dr. Sigmund Freud,” most famous for being the father of analytical psychoanalysis. Perhaps this song has great historical context and has, in facto, opened itself to evaluation by even the most amateurish of thinkers.

“Give it to me baby
Ah ha, ah ha
Give it to me baby
Ah ha, ah ha”

The female voice is not that of his sexual partner. It was a session artist. And one of that nature can be told what to say and how to say it. The fact that Dexter had her say sexually suggestive lyrics in a Hispanic accent is perhaps a euphemism on the subject's choice of quality in girls. The “Ah ha's” can very well be coming from a deep lingering for attractive Hispanic females. Or if one was to play Devil's advocate you could say that he is, in that way that rich people seem to be, just a little bit racist.
He has already said “Niggers” twice in the deceptively catchy little diddy titled LAPD. Although you could put it in context as an allegory for the oppressive LAPD and their arresting methods. He also calls out his own race when he says “Beat all the white trash” during the same song. But it does not seem to have the impact that the other word did.
So with that in mind and from reading the lyrics ahead of time (pardon me for that) it is probably more in the vein of one mocking Latino's and their dialect. Dexter uses a lot of Spanish influence his music. Their fourth album was titled “Ixnay on the Hombre” and had matching Spanish inspired album art with references to Day of the Dead. So there is a chance he does not see just how racist he is being and is just portraying them as he accurately sees and hears them, you know, like in cartoons, specifically Speedy Gonzales.

“And all the girlies say I'm pretty fly, for a white guy”

Is this a declaration or a presumption? It has to be assured that a female has said this to the song's subject at least once during his life time. A man of his height, attractiveness, intelligence, and money can easily get any girl to say positive things about your esteem. Which may be the case here. After all, women be hookers and stuff.

“Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco cinco, seis”

The use of Spanish in this song signifies the racial boundaries Brian Holland will cross. For he knows no limit to his mockery. Undoubtedly suffering from self esteem of the positive variety. Brian is confident enough in his standing to pronounce his personal ideals on those within ear shot of this song's lyrics. Pushing an agenda maybe? Let's look further.

“You know it's kind of hard
Just to get along today
Our subject isn't cool
But he fakes it anyway”

Dexter incites observations here that he would not know unless the subject was he himself. Dexter's Latino fetish can be observed on two other tracks “Original Prankster” and “OC Guns” which makes one to think that he possibly has lower self esteem than he puts out? Perhaps this song was written in order for him to come to terms with his longing to be a wigger. Oh Dexter, if only you had the money and means to seek therapy, it could help you with your identity crisis (another example of this aforementioned identity crisis: “Days Go By”)

“He may not have a clue
He may not have style”

Dexter sings this, yet is continually seen wearing T-Shirts of a more humorous, and juvenile, nature. Making one wonder what his standards for the appropriate dress just might be. Perhaps he is a shirt and jeans man, like so many others. He lacks the sense of pride that would prevent him from wearing such ill advised attire.

“But every he lacks
Well he makes up in denial”

But Dexter, aren't you aware that you yourself may be in denial. Perhaps about you may believe that the high notes you normally hit are in fact that, normal. But typical for most males over the age of thirteen, such pitches are well out of range. Although I would go as far as saying that singing in that high of a key is effeminate, but, come on, Sting!
*It is also to my knowledge that The Offspring have in fact covered The Police record “Next to You.” which sits perfectly well in Dexter's range. So... Like, come on, Sting!

“So don't debate
A player straight
You know he doesn't get it anyway”

Perhaps Dexter's assessment of this man's place in society has been askewed. For everyone has their own uniqueness to them. Who is to say that he in fact does have style, perhaps one that will be fashionable in the coming years. This is a narrow remark that would be common amongst men of his height, temperament, and upbringing. To him he sees what many people have been dubbed “Wiggers.” A combination of both “White” and the highly negative word “Nigger,” this term can given to anyone of limited means who may enjoy that recordings from rap artists and DJ masters and acts in mannerisms and speaks in dialect as such as the widely accepted and popularized persona of the ignorant male or female of African descent. It is considered a racist term for having both the root word being racist and the word itself being a blatant bigotry against white Americans. Wigger's British counterpart is the word, slang “Chav.” Leave it to the British to make racism sound refined.

“He's gonna play the field
And keep it real
For you no way, for you no way”

This seems to be confusing on some aspects. Seeing as Dexter clearly states that the subject in question will, in fact, play the field and keep it real. But for you no way? It appears that the man in question will revert from his lifestyle and music of choice back into his original personality if another human being is present. Confusing matters is that when does the subject display his ebonic vernacular or his jeans that fall to the bottom of his glutes, he is immediately dismissed as a “poser.” Which I believe constitutes posing of some kind. I don't know, kids today say a lot of mean things about each other.

“So if you don't rate, just overcompensate
At least you'll know you can always go on Ricki Lake”

Assuming the subject of the song is still “posing” at this point, it is suggested that if he does not meet up to the strict codes of the commercialized African American conduct and appearance, then one is to take it up another notch, which would in fact make Dexter's fictionl “wigger” that much more racist.
And to say that him and people of his ilk are entertaining enough in their private affairs as to give it audience on the Ricki Lake show. Forever burning 1997 into the song, making it dated once, and since, the Ricki Lake show went off the air. But once it was the epoch of eastern southern culture. A many a baby daddy gonna man up and do the right thing thanks to the assistance of Misses Ricki Lake. Exploitation never became so much of a theater and to mind you that this predates the most offensive of Jerry Springer shows. Ricki Lake was once the woman with the magic touch. One straight talk from Miss Lake would in effect cause a troubled young man or woman to change their promiscuous ways in ebonics too slurred in southern drawl to decipher properly.

“The world needs wannabe's
So hey! Hey! Do that brand new thing!”

Dexter for once applauds the ones undetermined to make their place rightly in society. For if one is rich, then another must be poor. We are not a nation of equals, which this song presents with an astounding amount of shouting. We are all different and unique snowflakes who must make our mark anyway you can. If you can't, then strive to be around those who are of a greater fortune than oneself.
Basically we need all kinds of people to make a proverbial rainbow. Everyone fills some niche that society needs filling. Some are just taller, more handsome, richer, have a bigger dick, is a stupid awful human being who is shitty and takes my girlfriend and fuc... I mean, everyone is important. That works right?
Also, Dexter declaring that his subject must do this “brand new thing,” after multiple listenings and deep analysis, I have determined this to be sarcastic.

*Cow bell*

The cowbell can only represent the ideology that our civilization was founded on agriculture and the breeding and slaughter of animals. The fact that the cow wears a bell is not lost on Brian Holland, who in reference to our great industrialized nation, sampled the cow bell from Rock of Ages.

“He needs some cool tunes
Not just any will suffice
They didn't have Ice Cube
So he bought Vanilla Ice”

To make the assumption that even the most limited of thinkers would not be able to discern the difference between Ice Cube (who has, in the past, been associated with various bitches and hos) and Vanilla Ice (who has been associated with various defunct reality programming). But if such a person of low IQ exists, it is perhaps due to a genetic abnormality that prevents one from recognizing that Ice Cube, to quote my Djing and rapping counterparts, da man gots skillz.

“Now cruising in his Pinto, he sees homies as he pass
But if he looks twice
They're gonna kick his lily ass!”

This is of course assuming the size and quantity of said “homies” with the physical dimensions, health, size, and fitness of the accosted party. To say one is “lily” is to compare a rose with a dying fetus, in aggressiveness that is. If one is to go by the young male in the video, we would assume that some of the more aggressive fifth graders could take this guy on in a bout of fisticuffs.
Although this might be the idea, putting one of small stature and of dubious mental functionality into the adver-tainment (advertising meet entertainment) that is the musical video, therefore cementing one's idea of the song's subject. To further this idea of the young male being sung about in the video is sporting a backwards cap and a basketball jersey. Also he is seen throwing gang related signatures to passing “homies.” Thus connecting in that social way that is a beat down.
One last point about these lyrics is that they are killing two very racist birds with one stone. Insinuating that these “homies” are ill tempered and that the white protagonist cannot be an effective member of the hip hop culture are both, how do I say this gently? This is one racist song.

“Now he's getting a tattoo
He's getting ink done
He asked for a 13, but they drew a 31”

If one was not to receive the tattoo they had inquired about previously prior to sale, then that would definitely be a great disadvantage to the tattooer and the business establishment in which he works. It would open up all sorts of legal action. Which men of limited means and inadequate education are known to do with the prospects at receiving a large cash settlement are in the forefront of their minds. Perhaps this set up is another one of Brian's dexterous word play? Open to psychoanalysis this song is indeed! For Brian has made the connection between “white trash” and malpractice at law. Truly clever.

Friends would say he's trying too hard
And he's not quite hip
But in his own mind
He's the dopest trip”

What constitutes a good friend? Somebody who tells this poor man he's an important addition to the getto culture of our suburbs, or somebody (male or female) who does not encourage his attempts at being street and helps him find his own unique identity. This is assuming, but it is clear to see, that perhaps this song is in effect a deep personalization at Brian's own identity crisis, seeing as he prefers to be called “Dexter” in parody of his intelligence. Thus assuming an identity of the lead singer / lead guitarist of the Offspring. Can one separate themselves from their career? Or does the labor induce such gratifying heights that one cannot separate himself.
The man being sung about is also of the mind to believe that he is “the dopest trip.” This signifies a multitude of possible personality disorders ranging from narcissistic personality disorder to delusions of grandeur. The subject would be advised to attend empathy help groups provided by his mental health provider, should he seek one.

“Give it to me baby
Ah ha, ah ha
Give it to me baby
Ah ha, ah ha”

It is to be assumed that these words take on a darker context with the prior analysis in mind. They offer to give it, and Brian agrees, but what has been given in the first place? Has one achieved greatness through working through one's racism and hate through song? Has a higher level of empathy been acquired? Perhaps not, but for one to conspire against one another via a tuneful romp in B minor? That shows a level of malevolence not seen outside your local high school. It is a sad state of affairs when a rich kid jock goes about making fun of those less endowed than he. But is is known that those with narcissistic personality disorder revel in the aftermath of ruining another's social standing in the surrounding territories of concerned persons.

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