I'm drinking unsweetened chai tea. Whenever I drink plain tea I think of him. His perfect body, his perfect mind, he was so smart and handsome. With a little bit of chin hair that was just so cool. He also had longish brown hair.
I miss him so much... He was looking for something other than what I was and I lost him. I was perhaps a little too clingy. For the most part though I tried to treat him right, I slept with him whenever he wanted, I listened when all I wanted to do was talk. I lost someone really special and it somehow feels like it's all my fault.
In other news, I'm starting to get responses from publishers and such about my book "One More Suicide" and although the negative far outweighs the positive, it's still that one positive response that can get you published.
While that is exciting, I'm becoming a little worried about my output. Most writers can only write like one book a year but I'm normally done within a month. I suppose this would be a good thing to consider a pseudonym. Maybe one for my regular writing and one for my horror stuff. Horror is all I ever wanted to write as a kid but now I feel the pangs of wanting to do more. But by doing genre you generally have a base readership of that particular style.
Darryl McGhee perhaps? Nah... Maybe I'll just see if I can't publish more than two per year. Maybe more. The possibilities are seemingly endless I would imagine.
I still have that guy's email address. It's been beckoning me for quite some time now. I wonder how he is doing, who he is doing... He was the best thing to happen to me in a long time. I had never been taken on a date before. I mean a real one, like a dinner and a movie. To the museum, that was amazing. We saw Body Worlds and he explained all of the technical details to me. I miss him...
I bet I'm coming off sounding like a stalker so I'll just stop here.
I've just started John Grisham's novel "The Last Juror" and it's definitely out of style for him seeing as it's written in first person. I'm not a big fan of that perspective but I do enjoy his work so I suppose I'll give it a fair shot before burning it. I'm considering doing the same with Stephen King's Cujo. That fucking book is so damn boring that I have to make myself read it. If for anything other than I don't like having half finished books lying around, although I'm seriously considering it.
Not all of his books are bad though. Misery, Carrie, The Shining, and Needful Things are among my favorites of all time. Especially Misery, the guy gets addicted to codeine and has his foot whacked off, which doesn't happen in the movie. In fact his books are nearly indisputably different than the movie versions. Better in my opinion.
Although I never liked Cujo the movie, so I'm not sure why I'm not surprised that I don't like the book. Half of it takes place in a car with the damn dog outside the door barking. You basically read a hundred pages of them dying of the heat inside. Big whoop.
Two of his movies were better than the books though, Pet Semetary and Christine. Both were horrendous books and the movies took a better angle at the stories. Although Christine started off good, it wound up being a ghost that drove the car instead of the movie where it was just born bad. Bummer.
I suppose I'll leave you with the mental image of two naked guys wrestling in the mud for charity.