Just me sittin’ here Tweeting Snookie. I wonder if she has a sense of humor? I suppose I’ll find out soon enough. I plan to achieve a response without going within the realms of bad taste. I’m a gentleman and I’m gay which makes me unintimidating in the fairer sex’s eyes.
I don’t know what Snookie’s eyes are colored. I would look it up but I’m at school and don’t want THAT showing up on their search history! You know what I mean? It was like the time Justin Beiber turned eighteen and I searched to see if he’d grown any since the last year. Nope. Still short. I’m short too but I’m taller than Justin Beiber.
That’s what I’m going to put in my request to attend Harvard one day! “It’s not like I’m Justin Beiber sized!” I’ll be saying in every interview. Maybe Yale would have a taste for my dry / absurdist humor; Perhaps Oxford, where I’ll study under the great evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins, who will laugh and tendle and trudle and trossel over my rendition of an Irish man with low self-esteem and way too much booze.
It ends with a gun shot.
And that’s the gag!